接上

五、戒结构单调，组合生硬 “拉郎配”

由于汉英结构不同，表达方式迥异，“硬性翻译”不仅读起来别扭，而且会闹出笑话。这就要求译者在翻译时灵活使用整合的技巧，将句子整合，凸显汉语中所隐含的层次，补充所缺失的成分。有时要将简单句译成并列句，有时将并列句译成主从句。

在纪念大学毕业20周年聚会时，我忽然问起原来的班主任：“我个子又不矮，怎么把我安排在了第一排呢？”

At the reunion party for 20 anniversary of graduation from university, I suddenly asked my former teacher in charge of our class then:" Since I am not of short stature, how did you arrange me at the first row?"

一个高度近视的女博士去擦鞋店擦高统靴，秃头老板亲自蹲下来给她效劳。

When a woman doctor who suffers a severe myopic went to shoes-polishing shop for her buskins，the bald boss squatted down to serve her personally.

黑体字部分，正是契合了英语的表达习惯。

六、戒“愚忠”，不谙增减之道

我们耳熟能详的东西外国人可能会感到一头雾水，译者需要增加必要的说明和补充或者减译。否则，外国人会不知所云。毕竟，汉译英最终是给外国人看的。

例如：风水

fengshui——the location of a house or tomb, supposed to have an influence on the fortune of a family.

例如：（美国对台）“三不政策”

会当凌绝顶，一览众山小。

One day I shall climb

Clear to the summit,

See how small surrounding

Mountain tops appear as they lie below me

（新西兰人路易·艾黎译《杜甫·望岳》）

I can't open my eyes to watch you jumping into the fiery pit, for I will shut my eyes at the time.

我不会眼睁睁看着你往火坑里跳，到时候我会闭上的。

不要嫌我黑，两眼放光辉；不要嫌我瘦，一身好精肉。

Do not Cold-shoulder me for my swarthy(黝黑的) face, but I have a pair of bright piercing(敏锐的) eyes;

Do not Cold-shoulder me for my slight figure, but I’m lean and healthy.

文中the location of a house or tomb, supposed to have an influence on the fortune of a family.

on support for Taiwan independence, no support for a two-China policy, and on support for Taiwan membership in international organizations on the basis of statehood.

七、戒语句重复

汉语多重复，以强化语气；英语则要尽量避免重复。

先生曰：“狼负我，狼负我！”狼曰：“吾非固欲负汝。天生汝辈，固需吾辈食也。”

"You are an ungrateful beast," complained the man.

"Not at all," retorted the wolf, "it is not that I’m ungrateful, but you men were created for us to devour."

（颜惠庆译《马中锡·中山狼传》）

王曰：“此鸟不飞则已，一飞冲天；不鸣则已，一鸣惊人。”

"The bird may not have flown yet", replied the King,"Once it does, it will soar to the sky. I may not have cried out yet, but once it does, it will startle everyone."

（杨宪益译《史记·滑稽列传》

阿凡提借了财主一锭金子，还他时给了他两锭。

Afanty borrowed a small ingot of gold from a moneybags, but repaid him two ones.

（选自艾临《幽默新大陆》）

又斗争，又团结，以斗争的手段，达团结之目的。

Unity, struggle, unity through struggle.

中国人也好，外国人也好，死人也好，活人也好，对的就是对的，不对的就是不对的。

What is right is right and what is wrong is wrong, no matter what it concerns, the Chinese or foreigners, the dead or the living.

八、戒另起炉灶，走失精气神，沦为法国作家梅纳日所批评的 “不忠的美人”——即语言优美但不忠于原文。（参见2005年08月26日《济南日报》： 艾临文章《不忠的美人与忠实的美人——写在〈每天幽它一默〉出版后》）严复在翻译《天演论》时偶 有为“雅”而不“信” （见陈廷佑《英文汉译技巧》）。译文要力求其“信”，尽可能契合汉语原来句子的气势、情绪和结构。

例如，元朝人王实甫写下了《西厢记》，张雪静改编后并作了翻译——

掏出张生那封信，回头环视见梳妆台上的梳妆盒，眼睛一转，心里说有了，将信放了进去，合上盖时故意压了一角露在外面。

Rose took out Zhang’s letter, she thought, “It would be better to put it in her make-up case, and letter find it herself.” So she put the letter in the case, leaving a corner of it sticking out, so that it would be quickly noticed.

不难看出，译文与原文相去甚远，互不吻合，成了“两张皮”。

我们不希望这件事影响中美关系。

China hates to see Sino-US relations damaged by this incident.

用China hates to比“We don’t hope”贴切。

吾十五有志于学，三十而立，四十而不惑，五十而知天命，六十而耳顺，七十而从心所欲不愈矩。

At fifteen, I had my mind bent on learning truth; at thirty, my words deeds were appropriate; at forty, I perceived truth and doubts ceased; at fifty, I understood what heaven had mandated for mankind; at sixty, I could comply with the appointments of heaven; at seventy, I could do as my heart desired, and never swerved from the path of right.

（金沛霖译《论语》）

你已经死在过深的怨愤里了吗？

死？不，不，我还活着——

请给我以火，给我以火！

Have you perished in this deep rancor and bitterness?

Death? No, no. I’m still alive.

Please give me a light, give me a light!

（欧阳桢等译《艾青·煤的对话》）

（来源：新东方专稿 英语点津姗姗编辑）