上世纪50年代的女性恋爱指南竟是这样的

美国威斯康星州的网友金·马克思·库钦斯基（Kim Marx-Kuczynski ）偶然发现了一篇上世纪50年代的“女性恋爱指南”。

 

她的男友在旧货市场淘来一本1958年的杂志，里面有一篇文章《找到一个丈夫的129种办法》（“129 Ways To Get a Husband”）。

 

 

这篇文章采访了16个不同职业的人，总结出了一份“女性恋爱指南”。

 

The publisher asked 16 people to brainstorm strategies lonely women could use to get men to pay attention to them.

杂志让16个人进行头脑风暴，总结出单身女性为吸引男性可采取的策略。

 

这些专家为了帮妹子们成功嫁人，脑洞大开，想出了各种“心机招数”......

 

From ordering rare steaks and no gossiping to crying in a corner of the room and getting a hunting license, some of these tips sound like common sense, and some seem to be… questionable.

从“点一分熟的牛排”、“不要着说三道四”、“在房间的角落里哭”到“考个狩猎许可证”，有些建议听起来挺正常，有的看起来则有点......不大靠谱。

 

一同来看看这本奇葩恋爱指南都讲了什么吧。

 

*常规操作篇*

 

❶ 怎么邂逅他

Get a dog and walk it.

养条狗，遛狗。

Get lost at football games.

在看球赛的时候迷路。

Sit on a park bench and feed the pigeons.

坐在公园的椅子上喂鸽子。

On a plane, train or bus don’t sit next to a woman — sit next to a man.

坐飞机、火车或公交车时，别挨着女人——靠着男人坐吧。

Attend night school — take courses men like.

参加夜校，选男人们喜欢的课程。

Go to all reunions of your high school or college class. There may be widowers there.

参加所有高中和大学的同学会，说不定有些鳏夫在那。

Accidentally have your purse fly open, scattering its contents all over the street.

让你的包包“不小心”敞开来，让里面的东西都洒在大街上。

Carry a camera and ask strange, handsome men if they would mind snapping your picture.

带着相机，问陌生的、帅气的男生是否愿意帮你拍张照。

 

❷ 怎么打扮自己

If you dye your hair, pick a shade and stick to it.

如果你要染发，挑准一个颜色并保持。

Wear high heels most of the time — they’re sexier.

多穿高跟鞋，会使你更性感。

Unless he happens to be shorter than you are.

接上一条：除非他恰好比你矮。

If you look good in sweaters, wear one on every third date.

如果你穿毛衣好看，每三次约会穿一次吧。

Get better-looking glasses — men still make passes at girls who wear glasses — or try contact lenses.

换一副好看点的眼镜，男人还是会和戴眼镜的女孩调情的，或者试试隐形眼镜。

make passes at：调情

Change the shade of your stockings and be sure to keep the seams
straight.

经常换换丝袜颜色，确保缝是对直的。

 

 

❸ 如何愉快相处

Laugh at his jokes.

听完他的笑话后记得笑。

Men like to think they're authorities on perfume. Ask his advice on what kind you should wear.

男人喜欢自认为是香水方面的专家。问问他你该喷什么香水。

Tell him he's handsome.

告诉他，他很帅。

If he has bought you any trinket or accessory, wear it.

如果他给你买了什么小装饰小配件，记得戴。

Show him you can have fun on a cheap date — but don't overdo it!

让他感受到，约会不用花太多钱，你也可以很开心。但别表现得太过了。

Tell his friends nice things about him.

在他的朋友面前夸奖他。

Send his mother a birthday card.

给他妈妈送一张生日贺卡。

Ask his mother for her recipes.

向他妈妈请教她的菜谱。

Buy his sisters’ children an occasional present.

偶尔给他姐妹的孩子买些小礼物。

Don’t discuss your former boyfriends.

别和他聊你的前任。

Clip and mail him a funny cartoon that means something to both of you.

给他发一些对你俩有特殊意义的有趣漫画。

 

❹ 关于自我修炼

Learn several funny stories and learn to tell them well — but make sure
you don't tell them to him more than once.

了解几个好玩的故事然后学着去向他讲述。但是要记得，不要把同一个故事讲几次。

Go on a diet if you need to.

如果需要，请注意节食。

Get that fresh-scrubbed look by scrubbing.

保持外表清新整洁。

Polish up on making introductions; learn to do them gracefully.

打磨一下你的自我介绍，学会优雅地叙述。

Stick to your moral standards.

坚持你的道德准则。

Don't whine — girls who whine stay on the vine.

别发牢骚。发牢骚的女孩无人睬。

Learn where to draw the line but do it gracefully.

知道自己的底线在哪，但是要优雅地表示出来。

Stop being a mama’s girl — don’t let him think he’ll have in-law trouble, even if you know he will.

别做一个“妈宝女”。别让他觉得他会拥有一个麻烦的岳母，即使你知道他会。

 

❺ 耍些“小手段”

Learn to paint. Set up easel out-side engineering school.

学一学绘画，然后到工程学院外面支个画架。

Wear a Band-Aid. People always ask what happened.

贴个创可贴，人们一定会问你怎么了。

Stumble when you walk into a room that he's in.

走进他在的房间时，绊一跤。

Stand in a corner and cry softly. Chances are good that he will come over to find out what's wrong.

站在角落里小声啜泣。他没准会走过来问你怎么回事。

Start a whispering campaign on how sought-after you are.

散布关于自己很受欢迎的“谣言”。

Walk up to him and tell him you need some advice.

走向他，向他请教一些建议。

 

 

*非常规操作篇*

 

除了常识性的建议外，该指南还提供了一些一本正经胡说八道的奇怪建议......

 

Have your car break down at strategic place.

策略性地让你的车在某些地方（比如他的必经之处）抛锚。

Be nice to everybody — they may have an eligible brother or son.

对每个人都友好一点，因为他们可能有个适婚的兄弟或儿子。

Don't be afraid to associate with more attractive girls; they may have some leftovers.

不要害怕与比你更有吸引力的女孩子相处，她们可能有一些被挑剩下的追求者。

If he's rich, tell him you like his money — the honesty will intrigue him!

如果他很有钱，那就告诉他你爱他的钱。你的诚实会激起他的兴趣。

Point out to him that the death rate of single men is twice that of married men.

告诉他单身男性的死亡率是已婚男性的两倍。（恐吓他！）

Stand on a busy street corner with a lasso.

直接拿着个套索去闹市的角落抓人吧。

 

这份古老的女性恋爱指南成功引起了网友们的注意，大家都啧啧称奇。

 

这是我看过的最棒的东西。

 

我觉得有一些建议还是蛮可爱的，比如“在工程学院门外支个画板”啥的。

 

随身带着帽盒？站在角落里抹眼泪？把自己晒伤？

别忘了，还有个进门的时候摔一跤，笑死！

 

从“曲意逢迎”到“做你自己”

 

不难发现，因为时代所限，这本“恋爱指南”中不可避免地出现了一些“物化女性” “男尊女卑”的建议，它们渗透到对女性的职业、言行和自我定位等方方面面。例如：

Become a nurse or an air-line stewardess-they have very high marriage rates.

成为一名护士或者当一名空姐：她们有非常高的结婚率。

Don't talk about how many children you want.

别和他聊你想要几个孩子。

Find out about the girls he hasn’t married. Don’t repeat the mistakes they made.

了解那些他没娶的女孩，别和她们犯一样的错误。

Never let him believe your career is more important to you than marriage.

永远不要让他觉得你的事业比婚姻更重要。

If you see a man with a flat, offer to fix it.

如果你遇到一个有房子的男人，可以表示愿意去帮他打理。

Let it be known in your office that you have a button box and will sew on bachelors’ loose buttons.

让你办公室的人知道你有一个针线包，可以为单身汉缝扣子。

Buy a convertible. Men like to ride in them.

买辆敞篷车。因为男人喜欢开敞篷车。

 

部分网友也对这些所谓的“建议”嗤之以鼻：

 

我买了敞篷车，赚了大把钱，那我干嘛还要找个老公？

 

我不能相信这些玩意被当“建议”给了出来。把这种垃圾印刷出来，难怪我们会需要妇女解放运动！

 

与此相对应的1958年的男性杂志。内容总结起来如下：

1.你想怎样都行。

2.除了哭。永远别哭。

3.哦对了，也不要谈及你的心理感受。

4.如果你觉得伤心，还是自杀好了。

 

最早在网上发布这些文章图片的库钦斯基也认为，要结合时代因素去看待这些建议。

 

“I think the article is reflective of the social mores of the era, and I found the comparison between what was acceptable then and what is acceptable now fascinating. It also made me grateful that so much progress has been made. ”

我觉得这篇文章是那个时代社会道德的一个反映。并且，我发现比较“当时可以接受的准则”和“现在可以接受的准则”是有趣的事情。让我同样感激的是，我们已经有了如此大的进步。

mores /'mɔːreɪz/：道德观；风俗习惯

 

她补充道，将“嫁人”当作女性的最高追求，反而无法得到美满的婚姻。

 

“I think if someone is actively looking for a life-long partner just for the sake of being married, they will end up in a failed relationship whether they legally sever it or not.”

我觉得，如果有人是纯粹为了结婚而积极地寻找终生伴侣，无论他们最终是否离婚，这都将会是一段失败的关系。

 

六十年过去了，越来越多的女性在经济上能够独立，思想上，“相夫教子”也不再是她们的人生终极目标。

 

很多优秀的女性走向了更广阔的舞台，为国家、社会和自身的权益发声。

 

相信种种为了俘获对方而存在的“恋爱指南”，也将随着时代的发展而落伍。

 

但是，努力使自己变得优秀的人，在任何年代都是最迷人的。

 

（来源：中国日报双语新闻微信  编辑：左卓、丹妮）