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中国日报双语新闻微信 2021-07-04 08:00






Men and women come in several behavioural layers. As such, one might not feel connected to his/her date regardless of how beautiful and intelligent the person may appear.



Getting a call back is not entirely dependent on how well the date goes. A date can go sour and afterward, the person would reach out. Also, it could go well and you get ghosted.



Ghosting, after a date, is based on different reasons and some far from how the date turns out. However, getting ghosted is not a gender-specific experience, men get ghosted just as women do after a date. Although, it is arguable that women get ghosted more than men, after a date.







According to Natalie Jones, a doctor of psychology, someone's reason for ghosting you has little to do with you. She suggests that it could be a result of attachment issues, emotional level, and several more.



人们在约会后杳无音讯(ghost after a date),主要有以下五个原因:


1. 他们不想作出承诺

They are not into commitments




When your motive doesn't match theirs, there is a possibility, you won't be getting a call or text back, after the day out together. Commitment in a relationship is a big step and certain people are not in that frame of mind to take the step. If building a relationship is the next step you intend to take and it isn’t theirs, then the probability of ghosting you after the date is high, regardless of how connected you might feel or not. No one likes to take up what they are not ready for.



2. 她/他心里还有别人

There is someone else in the picture




Not everyone that goes on a date is completely single. Matter of fact, there is no rule against hitched individuals going on a date with a single person. Sometimes, hitched individuals go on dates to relieve themselves of stress from their partner, or just to experience hanging out with someone new. If you happen to go on a date with someone in this category, getting ghosted is very possible. A married person or someone in a serious relationship will not totally commit to someone single. Except the thought of being a side-chick or side-guy is appealing to you.



3. 他们已经得手了

They got what they wanted




Dates can be beautiful and romantic, so much that an instant connection happens and sparks fly. This could lead to having sex, transferring money, or giving out a piece of vital information that helps the other person. For some people that have the motive of gaining something from the date asides from getting to know you, when they get what they want, there is likely to be no text or call back. You get ghosted.



4. 他们有点焦虑

They have anxiety issues




Getting ghosted could be a result of fear. There are people who battle with anxiety birthed from fear. The fear of not being enough and lovable, which could be a result of past failed relationships. This type of people hold back from reaching out after a date, to avoid going through such again. Even when the date goes well, It seems too good to be true. Dr. Jones says "they may do things to self-sabotage, like ghosting".



5. 他们对你没兴趣

Not interested




The preference of what people desire in a partner varies. In most cases, if their date doesn’t measure up to what they desire, they ghost. People have a mental picture of what they want their partner to look like. Although, love happens and some people end up with the total opposite of what they initially pictured. Several others stick to what they have pictured.




(来源:中国日报双语新闻微信  编辑:商桢、丹妮)

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