当前位置: Language Tips> 双语新闻

儿子要成长,妈妈应放手

Mums should back off their boys and let dads be more involved in their upbringing

中国日报网 2015-03-19 15:33

分享到

 

A top parenting expert has warned mothers that being too possessive of their sons and not letting men be strong father figures can be detrimental to their boys' upbringing.
一位高级育儿专家提醒各位母亲,对儿子的占有欲过强,父亲高大的形象难以树立,会对男孩成长造成不利影响。

儿子要成长,妈妈应放手

The frank advice comes from parenting expert Noël Janis-Norton in her new book Calmer, Easier, Happier Boys.
这一直白的建议来自育儿专家诺埃尔•詹尼斯•诺顿的新书《更冷静,更简单,更快乐的男孩》(Calmer, Easier, Happier Boys)。

According to the parenting and behavioural specialist and former teacher, fathers have much greater influence than mothers in shaping boys into well-adjusted young men - but too often mothers find it hard to back off and let dad take control.
据这位育儿行为专家所言,相较母亲这个角色而言,父亲在儿子成长为有教养的年轻人这段期间,对孩子有着更大的影响。但是更多的情况下,母亲很难放手,让其丈夫担任此责。

'Without a strong father-figure, (which could also be a step-father or grandfather), boys may struggle to learn how to express their emotions constructively, how to handle their physical strength and learn to respect others - and themselves,' Janis-Norton tells the MailOnline.
‘没有一个强壮的父亲形象,(也可以是继父或者祖父、外公),男孩可能很难学会如何有效地表达他们自己的情感,如何去控制他们的身体力量以及学习尊重他人和自己,’诺顿告诉《每日邮报》。

‘Mothers need to allow dads to be dads and to have their own relationship with their children - and in particular with their boys - without trying to micromanage,' she says.
“妈妈要让爸爸有机会成为一个好爸爸,让爸爸和他的孩子,特别是和儿子建立自己的一种关系,尽量避免管得太细。”她说。

The parenting expert, who has been credited by the likes of Helena Bonham-Carter turning her family life around, also warns mothers about being barking too many orders.
这位育儿专家还呼吁各位妈妈们不要管太多。这位育儿专家曾得到像海伦娜•伯翰•卡特这样的名人认可,她说她的家庭生活彻底得到了改变。

'A boy will lose respect for the mother who appears to bossing the father around – or criticising him,' she says.
‘如果妈妈总是对爸爸呼来喝去的,又或是经常责骂爸爸,男孩就会失去对妈妈的尊重。’她说。

So when Dad gets little Tommy dressed in the wrong clothes, feeds him the wrong breakfast and then starts a pillow fight should Mum just look on through gritted teeth?
所以当爸爸给小汤米穿错衣服,做坏早餐然后开始枕头大战的时候,难道妈妈还是要咬牙切齿一言不发吗?

'Yes - absolutely she should!' says Janis-Norton. 'And the gritted teeth part comes because mums assume they know best - but actually none of us is perfect. We’ve got weaknesses too.
“是的,她当然要这样!”诺顿说。妈妈会对上述行为咬牙切齿是因为她们觉得自己知道怎么做是最好的,但是实际上人无完人。我们每个人都有缺点。

'We’re not doing it right all the time. So really we shouldn’t be judging the dads!'
“人总会犯错。所以我们真的不要质疑爸爸的判断!”

Despite the title of her book, the Calmer, Easier, Happier Boys author, is at pains to point out that keeping calm is not always the goal. In fact, she actively encourages play-fighting for boys
虽然这本书名叫《更冷静,更简单,更快乐的男孩》,不过,该书作者煞费苦心地指出遇事冷静并非其目的。事实上,她很积极地鼓励男孩儿打打闹闹。

'Mums generally don’t have an interest in play fighting and they worry someone's going to get hurt, or feelings will get hurt, or clothes will get ripped or something will get damaged.
‘妈妈通常都对那些打打闹闹没多大兴趣。他们要么担心孩子们身心受伤,要么担心衣服被撕烂又或者东西被摔坏。’

'But none of that is as important as boys getting their energy out and through play fighting they learn a lot about how to fight fair.
‘但是任何事都比不上让男孩子们释放他们的精力重要。在打打闹闹的过程中,他们可以从中学习到如何公平决斗。’

'They learn how to control themselves, they learn how not to be too rough - and they also learn how to make amends if it does go too far.'
‘他们学会如何去控制自己,如何去把握尺寸,当做错事后,也知道如何去弥补。’

'Dads can teach boys all of that,' she says but does advise that play fighting that is likely to become manic or annoy others in the house is best taken outside.
‘爸爸们可以教男孩们所有这些本领,’但是她也建议,在家里打闹容易使人变得狂躁并影响别人,所以建议最好选择在户外进行。

 

Vocabulary

back off:后退,让开

boss around:发号施令

play figh:打闹

grit:咬紧牙关

 

(翻译:刘伊文SCNU 编辑:江巍 马文英

 

分享到

中国日报网英语点津版权说明:凡注明来源为“中国日报网英语点津:XXX(署名)”的原创作品,除与中国日报网签署英语点津内容授权协议的网站外,其他任何网站或单位未经允许不得非法盗链、转载和使用,违者必究。如需使用,请与010-84883561联系;凡本网注明“来源:XXX(非英语点津)”的作品,均转载自其它媒体,目的在于传播更多信息,其他媒体如需转载,请与稿件来源方联系,如产生任何问题与本网无关;本网所发布的歌曲、电影片段,版权归原作者所有,仅供学习与研究,如果侵权,请提供版权证明,以便尽快删除。

中国日报网双语新闻

扫描左侧二维码

添加Chinadaily_Mobile
你想看的我们这儿都有!

中国日报双语手机报

点击左侧图标查看订阅方式

中国首份双语手机报
学英语看资讯一个都不能少!

关注和订阅

本文相关阅读
人气排行
热搜词
 
 
精华栏目
 

阅读

词汇

视听

翻译

口语

合作

 

关于我们 | 联系方式 | 招聘信息

Copyright by chinadaily.com.cn. All rights reserved. None of this material may be used for any commercial or public use. Reproduction in whole or in part without permission is prohibited. 版权声明:本网站所刊登的中国日报网英语点津内容,版权属中国日报网所有,未经协议授权,禁止下载使用。 欢迎愿意与本网站合作的单位或个人与我们联系。

电话:8610-84883645

传真:8610-84883500

Email: languagetips@chinadaily.com.cn