单身狗注意了！长期无性生活或被定义为“残疾人”

近日，世界卫生组织WHO正在酝酿一项新标准，而新标准的内容主要是，从现在开始，那些因为没有性生活或找不到对象而不能生儿育女的人可以认定为残疾，相信很多单身狗听到这条消息已经心痛得不能呼吸了。

People who don’t have sex or struggle to find a sexual partner to have children with will now be considered as disabled, according to barmy new guidelines set to be announced.
根据世界卫生组织颁布的一项“疯狂的”新标准，没有性生活，或者苦于找不到性伴侣来生儿育女的人们或被定义为残疾。

Until now, infertility - the failure to achieve pregnancy after 12 months or more of regular unprotected sex - was not considered a disability.
目前，不孕不育并没有被定义为残疾，不孕不育指的是在一年以上的规律无保护性生活后仍旧无法怀孕。

But now in dramatic move the World Health Organisation will change the standard to suggest that a person who is unable to find a suitable sexual partner or is lacking a sexual relationship to have children - will now be equally classified as disabled.
但在这次戏剧性的行动中，世界卫生组织将改变这一标准，建议将无法找到合适的性伴侣，或者缺乏性关系去生儿育女的人们也同样定义为残疾。

WHO says the change will give every individual “the right to reproduce”.
世界卫生组织表示，这将给每个人“生育权”。

Under the new rules, heterosexual single men and women and gay men and women who want to have children will now be given the same priority as a couple seeking IVF because of medical fertility problems.
按照这一新标准，不论是异性恋单身男女，还是同性恋单身男女，只要想生育后代，遇到医学上的生育问题时作为伴侣都有同等的优先权借助体外试管受精技术圆梦。

But critics branded the new laws as “absurd nonsense” arguing that the organisation has overstepped the mark by moving into social matters rather than health.
但是批评人士认为这项新法规“可笑无聊”，他们表示世卫组织已经“越界”，从健康领域干涉到了社会问题。

Gareth Johnson MP, former chair of the All Parliamentary Group on Infertility, whose own children were born thanks to fertility treatment, said: “I’m in general a supporter of IVF. But I’ve never regarded infertility as a disability or a disease but rather a medical matter.
英国议会生育问题团体的前主席、议员加里斯-约翰逊说：“我可以说是一个体外试管受精的支持者，但是我从来不认为不育是一种残疾或一种疾病，它反而是一个医学问题。”他本人曾借助生育治疗生育子女。

“I’m the first to say you should have more availability of IVF to infertile couples but we need to ensure this whole subject retains credibility.
“我首先就说应该更多的利用体外受精技术帮助不育的夫妻，但是我们要保证整个技术项目是正经靠谱的。”

Josephine Quintavalle, from Comment on Reproductive Ethics added: “This absurd nonsense is not simply re-defining infertility but completely side-lining the biological process and significance of natural intercourse between a man and a woman.
英国公益组织“生殖伦理学评论”的约瑟芬·昆塔瓦莱补充说，“这个愚蠢的说法不只是对不孕不育做简单的重新定义，而且把生物过程和男女自然交配的意义完全搞乱。”

But Dr David Adamson, an author of the new standards, argued it is a “big chance” for single and gay people.
但新标准的作者大卫-亚当森博士认为，这对单身人士和同性恋人士来说是“大机遇”。

He said: “The definition of infertility is now written in such a way that it includes the rights of all individuals to have a family, and that includes single men, single women, gay men, gay women.
他说：“不孕不育的定义这样编写，就涵盖了所有单身人士生育子女的权利，这其中包括单身男女，也包括同性恋男女。”

***网友们看到这则新闻，纷纷坐不住了……***

OK, wonderful - can I now have a disability allowance please?---chassummer
“太好了，我现在能领残疾津贴了吗？”

So, if a minger asks you out and you reject them - are you now guilty of a 'hate crime'?--FedUP
那么，如果有丑八怪想和你约会，被你拒绝，这算不算“仇恨犯罪”？

I think most of these so called experts need time in a nut house!!!---johnjames
我觉得大多数所谓的“砖家”都需要被关进疯人院！！！

The more older I get the more I feel that the world has gone mad.---Saigon Sam
年龄越大，越觉得这个世界疯了。

This is great news! Now I can get one of those blue badges for disabled parking!!!---TraceyE
好消息！我也可以去领个蓝徽章，把车停到残疾人车位了。

I'm a 26 year old virgin. I have suffered my whole life..please someone cure me!---kramer911.
我已经“残疾”了26年，求治愈。

I must be the most retarded person in Britain then :)---HughJanus1
我一定是全英国最蠢的人了。

Darwin is confused.---ParkerLewis
达尔文都被搞晕了。

英文来源：英国每日快报
翻译&编审：yaning