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Humor Joke 幽默笑话

中国日报网英语点津为您精选语言地道的英语笑话，开心学英语。

可恶的教授

2009-11-06 09:30
"Young ladies," said the professor with a broad smile, "the next plane doesn't leave till tomorrow afternoon."

做作业

2009-11-05 09:18
Blame me？Oh, no. On the contrary, I’ll blame her, because it was she that did my homework instead.

写家谱

2009-11-04 09:43
He was a man who occupied a great seat. He was attached to his position very firmly. His death came as a great shock

为什么迟到

2009-11-03 08:58
Teacher: Why are you late? Kid: Because of the sign.

好心的爸爸

2009-11-02 09:04
But mum, I was sitting on daddy's lap.

不是好妻子

2009-10-30 09:37
We have been husband and wife for many years, but I don’t know that I am not a good wife until today.

我了解你的感受

2009-10-29 09:37
I know how you feel——and I have to stay here until I’m sixty-five.

和你的一样

2009-10-28 09:01
If you can make my hair look like yours without causing me any discomfort, I'll pay you $5,000.

祷告

2009-10-27 08:51
His older brother nudged him and said, "Why are you shouting your prayers? God isn't deaf."

不是我

2009-10-26 09:45
An overweight man in the corner replied, "It can't be me. I'm not wearing any."

我是她丈夫

2009-10-23 09:11
To which the man replies, "Of course not, you idiot...this is her husband."

我不是算命的

2009-10-22 08:49
I wouldn't know sir, I'm a waiter, not a fortune teller.

羊排还是猪排

2009-10-21 09:18
Can't you tell the difference by taste?

找不到理由

2009-10-20 09:32
Not at all. When she wants to scold me by enumerating my wrongdoings, she has no excuse at all.

老夫妇

2009-10-19 10:07
"Well," answered the husband, "I have to get my teeth."

下一个

2009-10-16 09:41
"Oh! I didn't mean the next diaper. I meant the next baby!"

收回他说的话

2009-10-15 10:03
If the Dean doesn’t take back what he said to me this morning, I am going to leave college.

找刺激

2009-10-14 09:59
So the doctor said, "Don't worry, take this, and after you see the bill, you will have all these feelings."

乡下佬进城

2009-10-13 10:06
The bumpkin opened his eyes wide in surprise and said in a long voice, “I should have brought my wife here!”

大脑袋

2009-10-12 08:51
“All the kids make fun of me,” the boy cried to his mother. “They say I have a big head.”

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