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24 Signs You're An Old Person Disguised In A 20-Something Body
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For years you've wondered why you could never fully relate to other people your age.
这么多年来,你可能一直在想,为什么你与同龄人总是有点格格不入。
What about hookup culture is appealing? Why are girls showing their midriff in the winter? How are the horrendous things they play on the radio considered “good” music?
比如,你不明白为什么约炮文化如此盛行?为什么女孩儿冬天还要穿露脐装?电台里那么难听的东西怎么能称之为“好”音乐?
At times, you probably even refer to Millennials as if you're not a part of the demographic yourself. The reason? You're an old soul stuck in a twenty-something year-old's body.
有时你可能会把他们称为“千禧一代”——说的好像你自己不是其中一员似的。为什么会出现这种情况?因为你20几岁的身体内,住着一个成熟的灵魂。
Here are some signs:
迹象如下:
1. You'd rather spend the night in your bed then out with your friends.
你宁愿整晚窝在床上,也不愿跟朋友们出去嗨。
2. You're annoyed by all of the annoying teenagers who play their music way too loud.
年轻人大声放着恼人的音乐,会让你烦的不得了。
What's the point in even wearing headphones?
他们竟然还戴着耳机听,跟外放又有什么两样呢?
3. Baking brings you great joy.
你爱上了烘焙。
4. You've secretly always wanted to join a knitting class.
你心里一直偷偷想要加入一个编织培训班。
5. Young & The Restless is your shit.
《不安分的青春》这类剧不是你的菜。
6. You enjoy walking for leisure.
你喜欢散步休闲。
7. You complete newspaper crossword puzzles everyday on your morning commute.
在每天早晨的通勤路上,你会做完报纸的填字游戏。
8. You despise the radio and listen to the oldies instead.
你看不上电台音乐,而是找已经不再流行的音乐来听。
Louis Armstrong, Frank Sinatra, the Beatles…the list is far and great.
路易斯·阿姆斯特朗、弗兰克·辛纳屈、披头士乐队……这种好听的音乐简直太多了。
9. You refuse to text in acronyms.
你发短信时不用略缩语。
10. You're always in some sort of pain for no apparent reason.
身体某些部位经常会莫名其妙的出现疼痛。
Your lower back, shoulders, baby toes, ankles, BASICALLY EVERYTHING.
你的后腰、肩膀、小脚趾、脚踝,基本上全身都疼。
11. Your knees crack when sitting down, standing up, walking up the stairs, walking down the stairs…
当你坐下、站起、上楼、下楼的时候,你会听到膝盖发出咔擦的声音。
12. There's nothing more that you love than covering up.
你不爱露肉。
13. You frequently mishear the things that people say.
你经常把别人说的话听错。
14. You still hand-write your lecture notes.
你仍然手写课堂笔记。
15. House slippers, fuzzy socks, and snuggies make you smile.
家里的拖鞋、毛绒袜子、保暖内衣,你喜欢的不得了。
16. Your signature dance move is the Chicken Dance, The Lightbulb, or the YMCA.
你标志性的舞步是小鸡舞、灯泡舞或YMCA舞。
17. You think housework is therapeutic.
家务能让你放松身心。
18. If you do go out, 12AM is your designated “time to call an Uber home” time.
如果你外出,半夜12点是你指定“该打辆优步回家了”的时刻。
19. You have a serious passion for wine tasting.
你对品红酒这事儿挺认真、有热情的。
20. You take pride in your ever-growing book collection.
你为自己不断增长的藏书而骄傲。
21. You aren't on social media.
你不玩社交媒体。
…partially because you're technologically challenged.
……一部分原因是因为你对科技之类的东西不太擅长。
22. You need naps to function correctly.
你需要靠午睡来恢复身体机能。
23. You ask for practical gifts on Christmas.
圣诞节你偏爱实用的礼物。
Candles and knee-high socks excite you.
蜡烛和齐膝长袜都好极啦。
24. People your actual age exhaust you.
同龄人好像都比你更有体力。
Vocabulary
midriff:上腹部; 胸与腰之间的部分
horrendous:可怕的;惊人的
snuggies:女式保暖长内衣
英文来源:hercampus.com
译者:bistu-高昊杰(中国日报网爱新闻iNews译者)
编审:杜娟
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