Somehow, I am 39. I am 39, even though I still feel like I am maybe 17 and I still look around for thereal "grown-ups." As I stare down 40 and gear up for another phase of life, I find myself going back to the things that comforted me when I really was a teenager, and TV and movies were both very big parts of growing up for me in the '80s and early '90s. I cut my teeth on old school Sesame Street and The Electric Company, I grew up with the Cosby Show and Family Ties and later 90210, and the movies I watched over and over starred people like Molly Ringwald, Andrew McCarthy, Ethan Hawke and a whole lot of hairspray. Recently, I realized -- with some amusement -- that a few of the lessons I am trying to teach my kids didn't come from my parents or from school. Instead, they came from scenes in those movies that I can still recite in my mind:

不知不觉我已三十九岁了，我三十九了，尽管有时候我以为自己还是十七岁，甚至还把年长的人看做“大人”。我等待着四十岁的来临，准备好进入人生另一个阶段，这时我却开始怀念起少年时的事物来了，它们曾给我以慰藉。上世纪八九十年代，我尚年幼，青春岁月都由电视和电影伴我渡过。孩提时期，我爱看《芝麻街》（Sesame Street）和《电力公司》（The Electric Company），然后是《考斯比一家》（Cosby Show），《家族的诞生》（Family Ties）以及后来的《比佛利山庄90210号》（90210），这三部电视剧则一路伴我成长。这些经典的影片也捧红了不少明星，例如莫利·林沃德（Molly Ringwald），安德鲁·麦卡锡（Andrew McCarthy），伊桑·霍克（ Ethan Hawke ）等等。年岁渐长，我才惊奇地发现学校的老师和家长并没有教会我多少经验，反倒是那些从小看到大的影片使我受益匪浅，种种人生意义我都从中学得，至今仍没有忘记，我甚至还想要告诉我的孩子。

1. Each of us is a brain, an athlete, a basket case, a princess and a criminal. (The Breakfast Club)

1.我们每个人都是书呆子、运动员、神经病、公主和罪犯的集合体。电影：《早餐俱乐部（The Breakfast Club）

Even in sixth grade, my oldest is starting to classify himself and his friends. I did the same thing at his age; I know how it goes in middle and high school. But I try to remind him that everyone he meets has so much going on behind the façade he sees in the hallways at school -- that everyone is fighting a hard battle of some sort, and that no person fits neatly inside a simple label. It's a lesson I learn over and over again, even as an adult. In the end, as Patrick Dempsey's "geek turned chic" says in another favorite, Can't Buy Me Love: "Nerds, jocks. My side, your side... It's hard enough just trying to be yourself."

我的大儿子在六年级的时候就开始给同学分类。当年我也这么干过；中学时期，青少年总是渴望标新立异，脱颖而出。但是我还是试图告诉他，学校里的每个人都有不为人知的另一面——每个人都有难处，不能轻易为他人贴上标签。在今后的生活中，我反复印证了这一点。此外，在电影《爱情买卖》（Can't Buy Me Love）中 ，帕特里克·德姆西（Patrick Dempsey）扮演的角色经历种种，最后由“怪胎”变成了“帅哥”，坦言道“运动健将，蠢货。你来我往……做自己太难了。”这部电影我也很喜欢。