THE WEEK July 17: The Knight, The Drunk and The Wench

Hey humans, get a pool
Summer has struck China with a vengeance. It's been so hot that in the Dead Sea in Daying County in Southwest China's Sichuan province, 8,000 tourists piled into the 30,000 square meter Dead Sea pool. Temperatures approached 40 degrees Celsius in Beijing and other parts of the country, and people were doing whatever they could to stay cool. The pool was so crowded that reportedly people were piled up on top of each other.
What's that sound you hear? It's the laughter of pet sea lion that unlike these ridiculous humans, had a luxury swimming pool all to itself. The sea lion, owned by a rich kid, was treated by its owner to a luxury hotel's swimming pool in Qindao, Shandong province, for its birthday. The animal enjoyed the ample pool so much that it refused to get out. Talk about being pampered and spoiled.

Brewtroleum
People, there are better ways to beat the heat. Has anybody heard of beer? Speaking of beer…Now you can drink and drive.
A brewery in New Zealand gives new meaning to being "tanked" by becoming the first in the world to use beer as petrol.
Brewer DB Export has produced the first biofuel using lager by-products, mixing 30,000 liters of ethanol with 300,000 liters of premium petrol. Sean O'Donnell, head of domestic beer marketing at DB, said:"Like many great Kiwi inventions, Brewtroleum was an idea sparked over a few beers." In other words, it's likely some of the people who came up with this idea were, well…friggin' drunk!

The Knight, The Drunk and The Wench
Speaking of drunks, a 22-year-old apparent idiot is facing theft charges and resisting arrest after he tried to steal and run off with a sword at a renaissance festival in Colorado, during a jousting performance.
A very drunk Connor Ward was chased by a woman dressed as a wench, who tackled him to the ground and held him in a headlock for at least 5 minutes until police arrived. As the wench held him, Ward kept laughing, finding the whole thing amusing. The woman's husband, dressed in a knight's costume, then showed up and held down the wannabe court jester until security officers arrived.
Talk about your knight in shiny armor.

（中国日报网英语点津 刘明）